Divorce and Marriage

W. still fought the divorce. He used his injury to postpone things again and again. Finally he told me, I could have the divorce if I let him divorce me. After I spent all that money on a lawyer. It was another way of making me the bad guy. By then I didn't care. He already had TK. Enough time had elapsed to dim some of the humiliation I was getting from the locals. People had found other things to talk about. I didn't have anything else to lose. I just wanted it to end, so I could find some normalcy. It took two years, but in 1984, I was finally free to marry Bear.

Oh yeah, things got normal after that. Let me tell you about my third wedding.

We had to get the license in our county. I hated that because it meant our names would be in the local paper. I just wanted to fade away into the woodwork. But, actually, I don't suppose it generated as much notice as I feared. Still we knew we were going to run away and get married anyplace else. I suggested we go back to the town my parents grew up in. Where I was born. We told his Mother and my parents our plans, and off we went. Bear thought it would be fun to be married on a Friday the 13th. Sounded good to me. I'd been married twice in Church and done everything right with wrong results. So a Friday the 13th by a Judge in the town where I was born sounded ok.

We got into town on Thursday and went to the courthouse to set things up. And ran into a snag. The Judge was so superstitious he told us he wasn't even coming in on the 13th. The courthouse would be closed. He told us he would marry us right then and there, or we could go to another town. We were dressed in jeans, but we looked at each other and said ok. Now will do. (Bear still celebrates the 13th and ignores the 12th.)

The judge took us to his office to talk to us while a woman rounded up witnesses and whatever papers they needed. This Judge took Bears hand in his. I believe Bear thought he was just going to shake hands, but the Judge didn't let go. That Judge practically ignored me while he kept asking Bear if he was sure he wanted to get married. Bear said several times he was sure. We were married with me standing on Bears left side and the Judge holding my Bears hand through the whole ceremony.

After our "honeymoon" (more about that later) when we stopped back at my parents house, Dad asked who the Judge was. I handed him the License with the Judges signature and my father laughed till there were tears in his eyes. You guessed it. My Dad (he'd gone to school with the man) never did get tired of teasing Bear about the gay judge who held Bears hand while he married us. My third marriage was off to a rip roaring start.