Warning.....X-Rated!
Let me see if I can get through this with some semblence of dignity.
Imagine (without picturing it to graphically, please) that Bear and I are enjoying what couples enjoy. He is on his back and I'm on top, in that on my knees position. And we are enjoying. Now Bear is a very into it kind of enjoyer. Neither one of us was realizing that as he arched his back, he was also scooting up toward the headboard. After all the enjoying, he relaxed and found that his head was under the old brass headboard. Go ahead and picture this part graphically. His nose was stuck under and behind the brass rail across the bottom of the headboard.....and it hurt when he stopped pushing down on the top of the matress. He panicked and started yelling. I'm sorry. I know I'm horrid, but it was funny. He yelled. I laughed. Then he started yelling for me to call for help. WHAT!! I worked with the folks on the squad. He went to school with most of our city police. Did he really think I wanted any of them to find us like that? I did try to help. As much as possible in the situation and in spite of my laughter. He wasn't making it easy with all that commotion and thrashing around. Finally he got his wits about him enough to use both hands to lift at the headboard while he pushed down and slid back out.
Crisis over. It should have remained our own private merriment. But, this man told on us the very next morning on the C.B. Radio! When people started coming up to me, laughing with tears in their eyes, I felt like I would release my own tears. In embarrassment. And, he wasn't even done. That weekend we were at the Moose Lodge Dance. Bear was dancing with one of my new friends. A couple he'd known since school. I was dancing with her husband (a city cop by the way) when I saw her stop dancing with Bear and just roar with laughter. Her husband danced us over to them to see what the joke was. And, Bear told him, with other couples stopping to listen. Before he was finished, the whole Moose assembly was in on the story. And I discovered that it is possible for someone else to do something that can embarrass you. (Would you believe that later he even told my Father?)
This all happened over 20 years ago, but "Bear with his nose caught under the headboard" still shows up in conversations occassionally. It doesn't bother me as much as it did the first time. Which is good, because he has been able to add other stories since then. And, I've learned to follow that old saying about "can't beat them, join them."
By the way. When Bear walks into the Moose Lodge, there are still folks who greet him with, "Hey Headboard Larry." (And some who call him "Lavendar Larry." But, that is another story.)
Imagine (without picturing it to graphically, please) that Bear and I are enjoying what couples enjoy. He is on his back and I'm on top, in that on my knees position. And we are enjoying. Now Bear is a very into it kind of enjoyer. Neither one of us was realizing that as he arched his back, he was also scooting up toward the headboard. After all the enjoying, he relaxed and found that his head was under the old brass headboard. Go ahead and picture this part graphically. His nose was stuck under and behind the brass rail across the bottom of the headboard.....and it hurt when he stopped pushing down on the top of the matress. He panicked and started yelling. I'm sorry. I know I'm horrid, but it was funny. He yelled. I laughed. Then he started yelling for me to call for help. WHAT!! I worked with the folks on the squad. He went to school with most of our city police. Did he really think I wanted any of them to find us like that? I did try to help. As much as possible in the situation and in spite of my laughter. He wasn't making it easy with all that commotion and thrashing around. Finally he got his wits about him enough to use both hands to lift at the headboard while he pushed down and slid back out.
Crisis over. It should have remained our own private merriment. But, this man told on us the very next morning on the C.B. Radio! When people started coming up to me, laughing with tears in their eyes, I felt like I would release my own tears. In embarrassment. And, he wasn't even done. That weekend we were at the Moose Lodge Dance. Bear was dancing with one of my new friends. A couple he'd known since school. I was dancing with her husband (a city cop by the way) when I saw her stop dancing with Bear and just roar with laughter. Her husband danced us over to them to see what the joke was. And, Bear told him, with other couples stopping to listen. Before he was finished, the whole Moose assembly was in on the story. And I discovered that it is possible for someone else to do something that can embarrass you. (Would you believe that later he even told my Father?)
This all happened over 20 years ago, but "Bear with his nose caught under the headboard" still shows up in conversations occassionally. It doesn't bother me as much as it did the first time. Which is good, because he has been able to add other stories since then. And, I've learned to follow that old saying about "can't beat them, join them."
By the way. When Bear walks into the Moose Lodge, there are still folks who greet him with, "Hey Headboard Larry." (And some who call him "Lavendar Larry." But, that is another story.)
posted by LeeAnn | 3:33 PM
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