Star Quality?....NOT

I never wanted to be a actress. But, I did love to be in our school plays and musicals. My first real play was during the last year of grade school. It was called "Too Many Ghosts" Actually I don't remember very much about it. Except that I was suppose to scream in one scene. No matter how hard I tried, the only hysteria my screams caused was the crew laughing hysterically. I knew all my lines and my teacher was pleased with my juvenile acting. But, I could not scream convincingly. So our Teacher/Director placed D.B. behind the curtain doing the noise part while I managed the action part. Which meant D.B. and I had to get our timing right. Which caused even more laughter in our entire cast and crew. Our poor teacher, a man, was pretty frustrated with us. This play was suppose to be scary and this one scary scene was a complete comedy. And, we were having too much fun with it. We never did get it just right, but we managed to pull it off, close enough, on the one night performance, so that only we knew the secret. I still can't scream. When I'm startled, I suck in air and hold my breath. I startle easy and I've had a lot of chances to learn to scream, but at the most, I might give a silly yell. It's such a funny reaction, people soon learn to sneak up on me, and I was constantly being startled when I worked. (Thank goodness, I don't wet my pants when I'm startled!!!!!)

My speech class play was Agatha Christie's "The Mousetrap" (I didn't have to scream for that part) We did our auditions for each part and Miss C. told me she wanted me to play Miss Casewell. But, she dropped a bombshell when she told me I could have the part IF I cut my hair. In the early 60's, most high school girls wore their hair above their shoulders in curls. A few did have curls just below their shoulders. My hair was straight and down the middle of my back. Many years before girls wore it that way. I tried to talk her into letting me pull it back and hide it under the collar of the dress costume. No deal. She was determined and I didn't know why. Miss Casewell is not a feminine part, but this was just a High School play. I was pretty sure my teacher just wanted me to cut my hair, in some effort to make me more like the rest of my classmates. (?) I wasn't a rebel my any stretch of the imagination, but I never cared about style or looking like everone else. After those two years in the "horrid school" I had made friends and felt comfortable just being me. And curls are a lot of work for a girl who spent so much time with my horse and the 4-H cattle. I didn't want short curls and rollers. For several days I was getting advice from everyone. And, Miss C. was pressing for an answer so she could start rehearsals. When Mom calmly told me my hair would grow back, I accused her of of cooking this up with Miss C. After all, Mom had tried to get me to cut my hair before. She said that wasn't true. It was just a matter of how badly I wanted to be in the Speech Class Play. And, this play was one of the big deals in our school every year. I wanted to be part of it. So, I let them cut my hair and I played Miss Casewell. I was lucky enough to have my hair cut by a woman who sympathized with me and didn't cut it as much as Miss C. had dictated. This woman used some kind of lacquer to keep my hair close to my scalp to make it look shorter than it was. I had to wear it like that to school for a week before the play. Then after the play, it took Mom and I all weekend to get that stuff out of my hair. And, I finally saw how I would look with short hair. Everyone liked it, but me. Was it worth it? I'm not sure. All that's left now is a horrid picture in the year book of me as Miss Casewell with helmet hair. And, Miss C. never did tell me I looked the part, or good, or she approved or so much as BOO. (But, the next year, my Senior year, she did make me Editor of the School Paper.)

Back in my Sophomore year, our school performed it's first Musical. The lead parts went to the Seniors, but the rest of the choir and the band were part of the production. That first year we performed "Rose Marie." There were two performances, on Friday and Saturday nights. It was a big hit with an audiance from all over the area. I loved every minute of it.

The next year we did "Oklahoma". As a Junior several of us had one line singing solo's in some of the crowd scenes. I was thrilled to be one of them. I'd been in choir every year and was also picked to join the smaller ensembles that performed at assemblies and special occasions. I even had several of the one line solo's in those performances. Actually the high school music teacher worked quite a lot with me. I thought it was because her daughter was one of my friends and I spent a lot of time at their house. Anyway, Oklahoma was another smashing success and drew an even bigger audiance. We were the only school in the county doing musicals and got a lot of advertisement on the local radio for the shows.

We did "Carousel" my Senior year. Of course, I wanted the lead part of Julie Jordan, but, Mrs. S. wanted me to play Carrie Pipperidge. This was the part with the very first song. A long soliloguy half sung and half spoken about marrying Mr. Snow. I actually had more singing then the lead part. But, I didn't have the song I loved the most. "You'll Never Walk Alone." It was a good part and I just wanted to be in the musical. As rehersals progressed, Mrs. S pulled me aside several times and stressed that as the first singer right at the beginning of the show, I would be responsible for setting the pace. If I did well in this soliloguy, everything would follow smoother. My family all decided to wait for the second performance. They reasoned we would be over the jitters and it would be a better show. Well, our first night went great. Mrs. S was so proud of us and we were all high with success. The second night, well, leave it to me. I knew my parents and aunts and uncles, and grandparents and friends from 4-H and Jr. Leadership and my boyfriend and his friend and even a friend from Toledo were all there to watch me. I forgot the words in that first long song and stumbled a bit. Just as Mrs. S said, everyone followed my example. Maybe we were too cocky after the first good night. It really wasn't as bad as we thought it was. Mrs. S was happy with us and the audiance loved it. My Uncle D told Mom if I hadn't stumbled over those words in the first song, he would never have believed it was really me singing. I guess that was a compliment. Of sorts. I guess. It was the first time some of my family had heard me sing. They told me they didn't know where I got the voice. There wasn't any talent in Dad's family. Mom played the accordian (her accordian burned in the Iowa fire and wasn't replaced) and piano, but she didn't sing. Though I thought her voice was fine and we loved to sing while we worked around the house. We liked to harmonize, and some of my improvisions sent us into gales of laughter.

If I have one regret, it would be that I didn't keep singing. Another friend played the accordian (which is how I got to hear Mom play it) and the two of us performed at local Churches and a few times at Nursing Homes, etc. Once, during the county fair, we were even on the radio. But, I got married and the singing was left behind. My first husband convinced me I wasn't really very good. (Our son, when he was grown, told me his Father was actually jealous) It's my only real regret and I wonder now where it could have taken me. Others did tell me I was good. My Gospel Songs had "real soul" A guest performer in high school told me that. He had asked the music teacher to recommend 3 or 4 students to sing with him. He gave me a solo part when he sang "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot." I was also one of the few students selected the summer before my Senior year to represent my school in a state choir at Ohio State University. I never wanted to be a "Star" I just wanted to sing. Now, I wish I'd kept singing.