More Bigtime Dangers

I'm not sure who was in more danger that time Dad taught us to fall. For some reason he decided to teach us what he learned in the Army about being a papatrooper. That is, till Mom dicovered him encouraging her babies to jump out of the haymow. What made sense to him did not make sense to Mom. If I was 5 or 6, J. was a year younger and S. another year and a half younger than J. We were jumping into a pile of straw and Dad was grabbing us midair and helping us land in a tumble. I don't remember being afraid, it was fun and there was a lot of giggeling. We had every confidence that Dad would catch us. But, it sure put a fear in Mom when she came to see what all the noise was. We did learn that a tuck and roll makes the landing of a fall easier. I've had a few falls, but I honestly must say that I can still stay relaxed and go with it. I may look silly, but I don't get hurt. Those lessons sure did come in handy a few years later when I was learning to ride my Gypsy bareback. S. was good at it too, but J. never quite learned to relax. Hhhmmm, I wonder if J. was the one in the air when Mom screamed.

One of the things a farmer does is use a corn knife to cut corn and cob to mix in cattle feed. Dad was cutting corn in the shed one day and I was there talking the way only a little girl can talk. He must have told me several times to be quiet and that I was distracting him. But, I could only be quiet a little bit, then I would start again. Dad cut off the tip on one of his fingers, bad enough that it bled....a lot. I KNEW it was my fault, and I ran and hid. Mom and Dad both came looking for me once they patched him up. They never blamed me and they just tried to calm me. But, that finger was missing a tip and even after it healed, it was short enough to remind me I caused him pain. Some things just can't be forgotten, even when you don't talk about them. I don't believe I ever told this before.

There was a windmill near the corner of the house. It was no longer used and we had been told to stay off. Aunt M. had a much younger brother. I don't know how much older then me he was, but he was just a boy. He started to climb the windmill one day, and when I told him we weren't allowed, he called me a chicken. So, of course we both ended on the platform just below the blades. (I don't remember them ever moving and I'm sure they were rusted still.) We were lying on our backs watching the sky and he told me how badly he wanted to be a pilot. This memory might not have been important, except that it was a secret R. and I shared each time he visited. And, somehow we never got caught. Years later, after I married, I received a letter telling me that he got his wish. Almost. That little boy grew up and took flight lessons. He was on the big flight with an instructor to get his license. They both died in the crop dusting plane when they hit electrical wires. There is an old saying, "Be careful what you wish for, you might just get it." You can say things like "But, he died doing what he always dreamed of...." True, and that "might" be ok for him. But, his wish caused his family (especially my Aunt M.) more pain then he could ever imagine. I was in Germany when it happened, and there was no way I could be there. I wrote a letter to Aunt M. about R. and I, and my memory of his wanting to be a pilot even when he was little. Then I worried if I'd done the right thing. I never got an answer to that letter and it has never been mentioned since. I'm still not sure what this lesson even taught me. Still, it comes back to mind on odd occassions.

We had a small porch on that house. I never played much with dolls, but I left one on the porch one night. Mom sent me out early in the morning to get it. When I picked up the doll, there was movement in her clothes. Hugging her, I picked up her dress to see. A BAT. A BIG BLACK BAT. I screamed, and danced and jumped up and down and screamed some more. The bat clung tight to my doll and I wouldn't drop her. Mom came running, probably the rest of the family too. Mom was uaually calm, but a bat in her little girls arms upset her just a bit too. I wonder what we looked like to anyone who happened to be driving on the highway past the house that morning?